What a glorious day yesterday was! We created the ridge and saw the portal from a distance. The New Leyto sandstorm season had lifted! I could see clearly now across a large distance. The colors were vibrant throughout the entire valley. On the road to the portal, we found a shack with an intercom and a note for how to activate the portal which we quickly did. Out stepped Commander Jones and Commander Patterson! In the distance, we heard a loud screeching sound. It looked like a naked man riding a giant flying dragon. The dragon swooped down and landed just a few feet in front of us. The jolly, overweight, naked man jumped down with a smile on his face. It was..... STEVE???
Steve replied, “Hey Captain! I bet y’all all thought I was dead! I did too! Turns out when I ate that cracker, I shrank into the size of a tiny particle and started drifting away with the wind. Luckily this here butterfly was kind enough to see that I was in trouble. It turns out we were both after the same mushroom that could make us both bigger so we set off on an adventure. Once we were both back to life size, I figured you would be at the portal by now and Sammy here knew the way and offered to continue our trip.”
Steve glanced over at the portal and yelled, “Guythimar here I come!” Before Captain Jones could protest, Steve ran butt-ass naked into the portal and disappeared. Captain Jones began to scream that the portal had not been correctly calibrated for his body weight. When I asked him where Steve just went, he did a few calculations, looked up and grimly said that it looked like a random planet in the Alpha quadrant.